Rivalry Department

The score matters. So does the material you bring to the group chat.

Evergreen planning notes. Check current official event details before traveling.

Roast the ritual

A rival’s elaborate pregame routine, overly confident prediction or questionable uniform choice is fair material. Keep the joke aimed at football habits and public traditions. People’s identities are not the punchline.

Know which story you are telling

Separate an actual result from a fan’s version of events. Before repeating a historical claim, check an official record. “Everybody knows” does not count as a source, especially after a loss.

The neutral-site personality test

Some people plan the parking. Some plan the outfit. Some announce they have a feeling. Agree on the meeting point before anyone starts explaining why the entire season comes down to this.

Win the conversation without ruining the visit

Keep a little room for the other fan to laugh too. A good rivalry joke survives being repeated across the table. If it needs a threat to land, write a better joke.

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